stargateficrec | Accidentally In Love by shetiger (NC-17)

Rec Category: Sheppard/McKay
Pairing: Sheppard/McKay
Category: Humor, First Time, Romance
Warning: Slash
Author on LJ:

shetiger
Author's Website: http://shetiger.com
Link: Accidentally In Love

Why This Must Be Read:

Rodney and John are both very straight men, so they just don't understand why the nice aliens thought they were a couple. Of course, that raises enough questions in both their minds to start them wondering exactly what they'd been missing, even thought they're really very straight.

They like women.

Really. They don't go on dates together and they don't get jealous and....

Nevertheless, their fumbling courtship is sweet and a little angsty and amusing and successful.

Excerpt:

If John had to pick a world out of a lineup starring those mostly likely to turn his life upside down, P3X-793 wouldn't have even shuffled through the door.

P3X-793 was a pretty planet. The settlement was located in a Mediterranean-like zone, and even without any of the Distinctive cliffs, the whitewashed adobe village immediately brought snapshot images of Santorini to mind. The people were just as warm as the weather. Smiles abounded, food was plentiful.

Yep, it was a pretty world. Gentle and colorful. John's own personal chaos butterfly, which alighted with a question so commonplace that he never even noticed it happening.

"How did you sleep last night?" Helena asked as she passed Rodney the cheese plate again. John would have warned her ahead of time that seating Rodney and Ronon on opposite sides of the table was a bad move, efficiency-wise, but she and Mikel had been stubborn about the seating arrangements.

"Fine, good," Rodney said, paying more attention to his fork than his words. "The bed didn't kill my back for once. Is there, ah, any more of the pear thing?"

"Of course." Helena managed to unearth the plate with the last slice of fruit tart from between all of the other half-empty platters. "I am glad that our hospitality suited you."

Then she winked at John.

"And how was your night, Teyla?" Mikel asked before John could finish panicking over what was probably only a friendly gesture. Probably. "Ronon?"

Ronon stopped glowering at McKay and looked over at Teyla on the bench beside him. She scooted her plate, still bearing half a slice of the tart, an inch closer to Ronon without turning her smile away from their hosts.

"It was most pleasant, thank you," she said while Ronon scooped up the tart. "The quarters were some of the most sumptuous I have ever seen."

Helena beamed like a mother gloating over her newborn. "I thought you would appreciate them. All of you," she said, making a wide circle with her hand. "I just had that feeling when you came through the ring together. The timing was too perfect."

John got that uh-oh feeling in his gut again, but Mikel simply rolled his eyes like Helena had just announced that the postman had brought another Publisher's Clearinghouse envelope. Mikel didn't let his opinion stop him from dutifully lifted his mug of water and tipping it gently in their direction. John held up his own, elbowing Rodney in the side as unobtrusively as he could manage.

"Ow! What?"

For once, arching his eyebrows was enough for Rodney to get the picture. It might have helped that everyone else had a mug in their hand.

"We thank the Ancestors for bringing us new friends," Mikel intoned, the solemn timber of his words at odds with the smile crinkling the corners of his eyes. He paused, looking at Helena until the smile met his lips. "And yes, my dear wife, our blessing is doubled by the presence of two such loving couples."

Ronon choked on his water. John wished he'd jumped the gun and drank as well so he could do the same. He looked at Rodney. Rodney looked at him. If they'd been back on Atlantis, John would have made some comment about seashell pink not really being Rodney's color. But Rodney was already recovering, the muscles in his jaw moving in slow motion to reel in his shock and spin out some insult that John could see turning this very nice visit into a disaster.

"Oh, ah," Rodney said, "we're not--"

"Used to such gracious hosts," John jumped in with his friendliest smile. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Rodney open his mouth again, so he squeezed Rodney's knee. Hard. "We're just happy to be here."

Helena's age dropped away as she ducked her head and gave her husband a sweet smile. John would have bet money that Mikel was going to get some later.

"What are you doing?" Rodney hissed in his ear at the same time as he dug his fingers into John's knuckles. John let go so he could grab Rodney's hand. "We're not--"

John kept smiling, but he turned his head so his profile hid their mouths. With any luck, their whispering would be taken for a simple lover's tete-a-tete. "Shut up, Rodney. Let the nice people think what they want to think, okay?"

He pulled back, raising his eyebrows each time Rodney opened his mouth. John was already wondering what the hell he'd been thinking when he decided to go this route. Not only was Rodney a terrible liar, but he also had an insatiable need to spill as much information as he could to anyone willing to listen. But little white lies were the bread and butter of good trade relationships. John thought they could pull this one off, if only Rodney would stop looking like a water-starved fish.

"Fine," Rodney not-whispered at last. John relaxed his grip, and Rodney eased away from him, looking back down at his plate. "But don't expect any PDAs."

"Wouldn't dream of it," John said through his smile. "Besides, I already have one."

"I meant Public Displays of Affection, Colonel," Rodney snapped. "I was trying to be circumspect."

"I know what you meant." John felt like burying his head in his hands. He figured there was no way Helena hadn't been disabused of her romantic thoughts by now, but she simply giggled at them.

"How long have you two been together?" she asked.

John smiled harder. "Going on three years."

"Practically newlyweds!"

"Ooh, grapes!" Rodney blurted, and suddenly became intensely occupied with trying to spear them from the bowl at John's elbow.

...