With Friends Like These (John'll Never Make The Kessel Run In Less Than Twelve Parsecs) by argosy(G)

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Rec Category: Het
Pairing: John Sheppard/Ship, Teyla Emmagan/Rodney McKay
Category: Het, Humor, John Sheppard, John Sheppard/Ship, Teyla Emmagan/Rodney McKay, Crack, Fluff
Warning: Another tragic Sheppard entanglement
Author on LJ: http://argosy.livejournal.com/
Author's Website: http://argosy.livejournal.com/77134.html
Link: http://argosy.livejournal.com/124663.html

Why This Must Be Read: There's an incredibly moving, fiery and passionate love story at the heart of With Friends Like These. John Sheppard is madly, truly, deeply in love and this time no one, not the IOA, not Caldwell, the SGC, Landry, NO ONE, is going to keep he and his beloved from spending the rest of their lives together. John admits that she might not be what he pictured when he dreamed about this day but now that she's here with him at last, he can't complain. John's not keeping his feeling locked up inside either. All he can think about, all he can talk about, all he dreams about is his sweetheart and everything they'll be able to do together. Not everyone is sympathetic to them. Ronon's so sick of hearing about her that he's started eating all his meals with the Marines. At least Teyla and Rodney understand how important she is to John and have been working hard for the last month to revitalize her from 5,000 years of neglect. Oh, didn't I mention? John's one true love is a ship, a Wraith hive, whom he can't quite decide between naming "Ring of Fire" or "Evel Knievel."

Somewhere along the way, Rodney and Teyla have become smitten with each other too while working on repairing John's baby in what has to be one of the more hilarious, tongue-tied and awkward would-be romances I have ever seen. John's a little concerned that their mutual crush may keep them from focusing on repairing his ship quickly so that they can be together at last and wishes they'd quit coming to him for romantic advice.

With Friends Like These (John Will Never Make The Kessel Run in Less Than Twelve Parsecs) is a deliciously cracky, silly and adorable story. Argosy's clever use of the POV of a John so consumed and distracted by his passion for his new ship allows readers like myself (who freely admit that they can't buy off on Teyla/Rodney) to enjoy the story (and the couple) from John's skeptical perspective as much as will fans of the pairing. Teyla and Rodney are very sweet and funny together but the true genius of the story is how argosy had me shrieking with laughter as John frets about his ship and the effects of this possible romance on her. Their relationship is the star here though I must warn you that like so many of John's romantic entanglements, this one is doomed to have a tragic ending.

A snippet...

Even if John had wanted to spend the day worrying about his lovelorn teammates--which he did not--his schedule wouldn't have allowed it. Around his eleventh month in Atlantis, Lorne had finally wised up and started refusing to do more than half of his commanding officer's paperwork, so John's morning was filled with mind-numbing requisition forms--the way the expedition went through C-4, you'd think they were eating the stuff. After that, it was off to the mainland to drill a contingent of Marines in jungle contact exercises--which mostly meant trying not to laugh out loud as they hilariously jumped out at each other from behind trees.

All in all, Rodney and Teyla didn't cross John's mind more than two or three times. An hour. He wondered if he should nudge one or the other of them in the right direction with a few well-chosen words, or let nature take its undoubtedly glacial course. This was the kind of thing he would normally go to Teyla with, but that didn't seem like a good idea.

There was no hurry. Rodney's romances tended to move at a snail's pace--he and Teyla would probably be dancing around each other for months. Of more immediate concern was John's new ship. His teammates' ridiculous crushes had better not mean they would try to draw out their work on his baby. John had been patient so far, but there was only so long he was willing to wait.

Nobody loved her like John did--it was completely unfair he wasn't allowed to be there for the test through atmosphere. It had to go well--John's heart couldn't take losing another ship. He still choked up when he thought about the Orion's messy end.

That wouldn't happen this time. There were no two people in any galaxy that John trusted more than he did Rodney and Teyla. If they said they were ready, then they were ready.

It wouldn't be long before the ship was his forever. John felt a wave of powerful emotion sweep through him. Blinking, he swallowed hard and looked to the sky. His beautiful ship was up there somewhere, waiting for him.

Soon, he promised her. Soon.